We are meant to point our lives in one direction towards the Lord, but something comes in between us (sin) and we can’t see it. We’re turned around, but we don’t know that we’re turned around. You’re walking away thinking wealth, women, wine, work is the right way to go. We’re trying to have Christ come in and lift that off of us so we repent and turn around. There’s a different way to live our lives and we don’t have to live underneath this despair (or loneliness, or shame, etc). In the book, he uses the illustration of an eclipse to say that something that seems big, but really is small, can block out the sun. The moon is 400 times smaller than the sun, but if it lines up in just the right direction it can block out the whole sun. Shame, despair, loneliness, lust are small things that can get in the right position in our heart to block out all the light so we can’t operate correctly.

Christ, who is the creator of the world,  is so much bigger than anything else. But something comes in (despair, loneliness, shame) that has the power to block out Christ and your whole life gets reduced down to those things.

The lie about despair is there is nothing really worth living for. The truth is your hope is secure in Jesus. Our focus today is how to fight against the Shadow of Despair. What tools do we have at our disposal for our fight? Last week we talked about two drivers of despair and one of those is unchecked desires. There’s a progression we talked about: a desire, the desire is not met so there is frustration, then there’s disappointment and then you make demands. When your demands aren’t met, if you’re not careful, it leads to death. That is happening to everybody, not just Christians.

Another driver is a misguided Telos or a misguided aim. We talked about this from Ecclesiastes 2. The wise man decided to pursue wine, women, work and wealth. It all led to vanity and he ended up in despair. He made the creation, not the Creator, his aim in life.

Today I want to talk about four tools to fight despair. What are the tools we need in our toolbox to fight against despair? We’re going to look at Psalm 57 and I Samuel 22.

1. Adjust Expectations: I want to follow David’s life for a moment. In I Samuel Chapter 16, David is crowned king out of nowhere. Samuel goes to David’s house in Bethlehem looking for a king. David has all these brothers who Samuel thinks will be the king but David, the youngest, is informed he will one day be king! In Chapter 17, David shows up at a big battle with the Philistines and comes off the bench to kill Goliath, their mightiest warrior from Gath. After he kills Goliath, he takes Goliath’s sword and cuts off his head. His victory and his name are immediately turned into a popular song – David was a HIT! “Saul has killed his thousands, but David has killed tens of thousands.” This works into Saul’s mind. He doesn’t like someone from the JV squad coming up and scoring a touchdown and getting all the glory. He’s the one who is supposed to be getting the glory.

Saul tries to put David to death and David realizes he can’t live around Jerusalem so he decides to flee to a monastery. At the monastery he’s looking for food and weapons. He’s given some bread and the only weapon they have, which just happens to be the sword of Goliath. David knows he is not safe so close to Jerusalem so he flees with Goliath’s sword, to Gath – Goliath’s hometown. You have to be really desperate to take Goliath’s sword into his hometown and hope that no one finds out you’re the guy that killed the hometown hero! David has to act like a madman. The King comes to put him to death and David realizes he’s not safe in Gath either so he heads back to Israel and hides in a cave.

David is in a cave and writes Psalm 57. When he was chosen to be king, David thought everything was up and to the right. But then expectation gets severely adjusted. For a long time, David’s life looks like it’s going downhill. If we think being called by God means all of life will be up and to the right, we need to adjust our expectations. Being called by God as a man to represent Christ in our culture will mean you will go through times of despair. John Piper says, “Life is War. It’s not always a war, but it’s never less than a war.” There are all kinds of wars and we have to adjust our expectations. If I am constantly looking for peace, ease and comfort then I’m going to constantly be in despair.

Adoniram Judson is one of the greatest American missionaries. He went to India and had a tremendous impact. However, at one point he was in such despair he went out in the woods, dug a grave and sat next to it, hoping to die and roll into it. He said, “God to me is the great unknown. I believe in him, but I find him not.” That happened to one of the greatest missionaries America ever produced, so don’t think you won’t ever find yourself in that camp. Jesus said, “in this world you will have trouble.”

I don’t know how many of you followed the story of Jake Phillips, he owns Masterpiece Cake Shop in Colorado. He’s a baker who did not want to bake a wedding cake for a same sex wedding. He got sued for it 12 years ago and just this week his case finally got resolved in his favor by the Supreme Court of Colorado. The lawyer who was representing Jake Phillips said he had never seen someone so faithful and steadfast. For twelve years, Jake had to stand by himself and say this is what I believe and it was costly.

2) Express Distress: What’s great about David is he gives expression to his distress. David isn’t afraid to write down and share his emotions. As men, one of the things we’re taught is to keep all our feelings inside. David is willing to say he’s not okay, he’s in despair, he needs help. Jesus on the cross had seven phrases and one of them was the first line of a Psalm, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” In his greatest distress, he’s singing Psalm 22. Do you have avenues to express your distress? Have you got some place that’s an outlet – a friend, counselor, journal.

3) Preach to Yourself – Say and Sing the Truth to Yourself: Fighting will require you reminding yourself the TRUTH! Despair tries to eclipse and distort, so you will need to preach to yourself. Notice how David does this in Psalm 57, it comes in waves. Verse one says, “Be merciful to me, O God.” I’m crying out because there are storms of destruction coming towards me. But it’s followed by verse 3, “He will send from heaven and he will save me.” It comes in waves – storms of destruction and crying out while also trusting God is going to save me. He goes back down in verse 4, “my soul is in the midst of lions.” Verse 5 goes back up, “be exalted, O God, above the heavens!” Then back down again in verse 6, “they set a net for my steps, my soul is bowed down.” Verse 7 – “my heart is steadfast, O God.” Waves of despair and expressions of trusting God.

Psalm 22 begins “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning?” That’s followed by verse 3, “Yet you are holy…In you our fathers trusted…and you have delivered them.” Jesus was only singing one line of the song, but he had the whole song in his mind. Even though in the moment he felt distress, he knows verse 3 is coming. God will save me. You preach to yourself – I am in distress but I know God will save me.

4) Family and Friends: In I Samuel 22, David is on the run for his life. While he is hiding in a cave, guess who comes rolling into the cave? His family. His Dad and seven brothers come rolling into the cave, imagine the encouragement they brought to this moment of despair.

In the next chapter, I Samuel 23, his best friend Jonathan comes to strengthen his hand. This is one of my favorite scenes. Jonathan is David’s best friend and he senses David is in trouble. Saul was closing in on David so Jonathan takes the initiative “to strengthen David’s hand in God” (verse 16). Jonathan sees David’s grip beginning to slip so he comes in to re-establish his grip, his hope in God. We will talk more about friendship when we talk about loneliness.

Questions:

1. When has despair blocked out light in your life or (like the water) when has despair distorted your vision of the truth? What was the greatest challenge in that fight against despair?
2. What’s your greatest challenge in humbly expressing distress?
3. What stories do you tell yourself when in despair? How can singing or saying the truth help?
4. When has a family or friendship been part of God rescuing you from despair? Do you have a Jonathan in your life? Have you been a Jonathan to someone else? Do you need a Jonathan?

Iron Leadership Materials:

• The Daily Office 10-11-24
• IL Handout – 10-11-24